Hair today Gone Tommorrow

Hiya, so on Sunday I hung out with my mom, and we went had lunch and then did some shopping and my mom wanted to get her hair cute so we went to this outta the way little hair place kind of in the ghetto, and we waited and she was like you should get your hair done , but i am so ultra picky and have to look at a bunch of examples of the hairstyle i want so that hairstyles can give me what i want, but i had been not liking my hair and really wanted to get it cut, so i explained the best i could to the hairstylist what i wanted to done to my hair , and ya know for the part it's pretty good , at times i think it looks like a mullet lol, but other times i look like a rock n roll chick , so i am indifferent to the haircut , what i really want is to dye my hair , and i asked my supposedly friend of mine to dye it for me which at one time she was eager to do , and when i texted her about it she got all scared :::rolls eyes::: so if she doesn't come through i am going to have my mommy do it for me , i know she will :::sticks tongue out ::: lol, it's funny this person on facebook who is a fan of my art work, doesn't want me to dye my hair she was trying so hard to get me to change my mind, but finally gave up.

yesterday my dad gave me the cutest Maneki Neko let me share a picture with you



Ya know i've always wanted one of these statues, but never just went and got one, i so wanted to many times take a trip to china town and try and find one, but never did, and then my dad gave me that and another one where its hand actually moves by being in sunlight it's awesome :) I love Asian culture, they have so much cute stuff and interesting ways, sayings, and superstitions. Like the Maneki Neko is literally "Beckoning Cat"; also known as Welcoming Cat, Lucky Cat, Money cat, or Fortune Cat) is a common Japanese sculpture, often made of ceramic, which is believed to bring good luck to the owner. also my statue has a mirror on the back which is suppose to ward bad luck and evil spirits away. I think it is so interesting to read about that kind of info.

other then that there is nothing really i would like to talk about some stuff going on but i am trying to work some stuff out. so have a good one and will let ya know if i ever get my hair dyed.

XOXO D

Are you Smitten????????

Um why yes I am smitten YAYAAYAYAAYAYAAYAAY, i know i am like a roller coaster one day i am bitching about men and how i don't think i will find a good one and now here i am Smitten.

Well let me tell ya the story, a couple of days ago I took a chance to write to this guy i talked a while back ago last October that is and was hoping he would respond back to it, and then he did and we started talking again and he is just the most awesome guy ever sweet, funny, and hot as hell ( pulls out a fan) :3 we can just talk about random crap and enjoy each others time just like the last time we talked it is great that we can do that, but last time he had car issues and lives kinda far, well even though time has passed he still is having car issues but this time around we are not letting it get in the way of us , because soon enough that "issue" will be taken care of and we will get to see each other that's right i have never met this man in person but we have talked on the phone a lot, he makes me smile and makes me feel really really damn good about myself, and last night we made it official that we are gf and bf hehe, so i am off the market, i put not single on the date sites and hopefully i will never have to go on them again, actually sometime next month i was going to stop looking on those sites so its cool this happened. But it's so weird i feel awesome , smiling all the freaking time and get all excited when he texts me and surprises me with a phone call lol. his name is Sean and i really like him and he really like me :)

Also you know how i show my affection by drawing people something, i asked him what animal he would like me to draw and he told me a tiger so i did last night, i drew a tiger and a cub , it turned out really really really well i was surprised, posted it on facebook and already got a good response.

Titled: Nap Time



Happy and giddy , and don't want it to end =D

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO D

The Sad, The Weird, and the weirder

First sorry it's been awhile since i wrote i should be spanked lol, but i am here now.

so the sad part is two nights ago my sisters husbands Mother passed away, she was living with MS and it took her life suddenly with out warning, she lives over in Pennsylvania and so my sisters husband went back there to attend the funeral, it's very sad to have lost a loved one and not being there with them and being able to see them and she never got to meet her granddaughter Bella, but at least she will be able to watch her from heaven :) yes i believe there is a heaven and all my animals are there waiting for me to be with them :) she was loved by many and will be missed severely, but the memory of her will live on and Bella will know of her.

The weird; so for a while i have been talking with this guy named Matt, we met on pof and we started texting each other, he sent pics he has been married, has two kids,etc which i was looking past ya know giving it a chance, because he seemed sweet and stuff, he is 31 , 6'2 , greenish bluish eyes. so any way we always just texted he is the first guy who didn't want to just talk on the phone , i thought that was kinda weird, any way we planned to meet today tuesday the 20th and the time before meeting i still hadn't heard his voice i even tried to secretly call his voicemail to see if had a message on there of his voice but he didn't, fail, so i just had to wait til we met, and he came at 1:00pm picked me up he was tall and looked like his picture and his voice was normal nothing bad or anything, so we went over to the park and i brought bread and a frisbee along, it was a bit cloudy and i was scared it would rain, but for most of it it was just cloudy , and we were both kinda quiet , me because i am always nervous and shy on the first date, and him he said because he was sleepy, he works night shifts at his job and he hadn't been to sleep yet so that was weird, so there wasn't that many ducks out to feed so i have bread left over blah, and then we talked but it wasn't that easy or smooth to find things to talk about, and then we played frisbee which was nice , because we got to flirt and what not, then we just chilled in this really nice area and then he had to go pick up his kids to hang out with so i was like oh ok, so yea kids i don't know if i can deal with that, i mean i tried not to effect my judgment of him, but really in a relationship a new one you want to be with that person and usually that person is free when their not working can be with you and hang with you, but he doesn't , he has free time and usually that goes to the kids and then if it does work out, he already has kids, and i want my own kids and he told me that he just wanted one more and i want three of my own so that's kind of another thing, the other part i just felt a little to young for him, he is only 31 yes, but he has been in a marriage for a long time and raised kids so that tends to mature people, so i don't know it doesn't look like it's working out for me, he is still blowing up my phone with texts and thinks it went amazing, but really i think it went sour, not sure how to let him down *sigh* just wish i can find someone who can be there and have fun and that i feel a connection with errrg.

still in the weird section; back in October of last year i was talking with a guy named Sean , me and that boy could talk on the phone it was awesome we would talk forever and hardly was any silence while we talked, anyway my dad and his wife were going to be going away to Hawaii for vacation and I was trying to get him to come out there and spend some time with me but it got complicated and we stopped talking to each other. I've always remembered our great conversations and how sweet he was and everything , so a bit ago i messaged him and i thought awe he isn't going to message me back this is pointless, but he did and i was shocked , so we just started texting each other of course after my date we started texting, he seems to be doing well, and he said i have been in his mind still as well and he wanted to message me but was scared and was glad that i did. even tho i started this up again talking with this guy i think it's pointless because i don't think it can go any further then just talking and being buddies, and that sucks.

The weirder; so i was on this other site okcupid because i got messaged on there and i was responding, and then this dude ims me on there and it's my ex's friend , he had messaged me before asking me to give him oral satisfaction, and so yet again he is trying to ask the same damn thing, i am like really, and he likes to argue with me why i should give it to him, i am like your my ex's friend, and he was like i only like talk once a year if even that, and repeatedly i tell him i am not that type of girl, but he won't let it go and keeps on trying to get me to do that thing for him, but i am not. another weirder thing is that i can't believe and maybe it's a sad fact as well, chatting with all kinds of people at the moment as i am trying to get this blog down and i am still freaking bored, i just really want someone that i can hang out with that we have such a good time that being away from them is like heartbreak, with someone who can have me stay over and lay in each others arms and just chill, like my best friend Melissa has, she found someone and they are just awesomely sprung on each other makes me utterly sick to see it, she always finds great people, and i always find the ones who are so close yet so far, Gees that is the title for my life lol "So Close Yet So Far" The Danielle M. Story will she ever find the love she is looking for , or will she settle for mister ok, keep reading and find out.

Side news cleaned the hell outta my room, bought a new sexy rockabilly like dress, and bought two shirts i shouldn't have but they looked incredible on me that i couldn't pass it up lol. still feeding Sunflower baby food. Been applying for jobs left and right. and i passed something yay that was big news, and more then finding the man for me, i wish it were summer and i can go to the lake and swim and lay out in the sun. well that's all for now night all.

XOXO D

Mmmmmkay

Sorry it's been a little while since I last posted, but really nothing has been going on a pretty dull week actually, my last post i mentioned i was suppose to meet a guy named Kirk , but i really didn't want to because i was to tried, well i texted him and he didn't even remember and i wasn't about to mention it to him, because i was already relaxing in my jammies so i was like whatever, i also have been working on this drawing of this series i am doing, i finished part of it, but i stopped working on it because my sister wants me to draw Bella and Edward so that is what i actually was working on today and right now it's a total fail erg i am not happy with it at all :(

so anyway it was Wednesday night i got a message from Kirk and he asked if i wanted to join him and go to Vegas for a day, and i was like hells yea that sounds awesome. so we had planned to leave Thursday evening after he got off work, and i was going to tell my family i would be hanging with Melissa the time i would be gone. We also decided that so he didn't have to go to far because he would be doing a lot of driving that i would have my friend Melissa drive me to a certain point. so the day of Thursday i was getting ready doing my hair getting my shit together and he asked me about my friend and i had previously texted her and she didn't say no to the idea, but then he said he had to cancel his plans because someone called in sick at his work and he would have to come in the following day around 3, i was like bummer. then he asked if i would like to get a room and hang out, oh now am i outta line but really what fun would it be to just hang in the room, i already told him i don't just jump into bed with guys that it has to mean something, and he got all pissed at me , so later that evening, he texted me and was like i am going to be down by San Manuel casino could i stop by and say hi, and i was like um sure, so first he makes a remark about having sex and i tell him for like the millionth time my position on the matter and he is like ok well see you soon, but he didn't whatever, i knew from the beginning his motive so lame, i am not a prude is it so wrong to want sex to mean something damn, cause see there is this guy in modesto that i would have sex with you want to know why, because he is sweet we actually have conversations we get along and he make me laugh and we talk about stuff, but this Kirk guy and the other guys like him just think they automatically are going to get it, i don't know what whores made it so difficult to just be able to connect with a guy emotional and then then enjoy eachother physically but damn i want to back hand those bitches lol, I really hope that jerk off doesn't try to talk to me again shit, sorry but the crap pisses me off, men piss me off. It is it really so damn hard for a guy to hold of his urges til the right time, they have a hand right, what have they been doing before, but instantly when there is a women in front of them they want to pounce it like lion does it's prey fucking A this shit is so annoying , fuck fuck fuck fuck sorry but that pisses me off so bad, i hate random sex i like it when a guy is into me and really wants me not just wants me because i have a pussy, that is sooo lame , gees maybe i should of stayed with David even though he was a little eccentric and odd at least he knew how to treat a women and please one hehe.

OK enough of that I had a stupid dream about my ex we were talking and i was telling him how i loved his mom because she was nice and stuff but he was like no way she was mean to you and other stuff and i was like well yea but she's still a good women and then i was like eating some mini wheats and he kissed me and ate my mini wheat i just put in my mouth lol, and then we stared at each other and he was mmmmm i missed your taste and then we started making out like teenagers. I woke up and shuddered i hate those dreams, in dream meanings it probably means like i want us back or i am not over him or some shiat. I don't want to dream of him bleh.

In sad news I think my oldest rat Sunflower is going to be passing, she's thin she's not eating and i haven't even seen her drink water, i think it's because over her overgrown teeth that i try and cut but i don't think it's doing any good, i had my friend help me but she doesn't have the guts to handle it so i have to wait for my mom to help me better, but i got some baby food and been feeding her that and she's been eating it and then i give her water through a syringe, i just hope it's helping her, if i could i would put her down , i just don't want her to be in any pain, hopefully when my mom comes we can get the job done , she fights so much though so much, she's my little wild rat, the momma rat. I LOVE YOU SUNFLOWER .... soon you may be with your sister Yumyum :(


XOXO D

Happy Easter

Here comes peter cotton tail hopping down the bunny trail hippity hoppity Easter's on it's way SMACK its here bitch and it's over lol, today was a good day spend it with my family, we ate a great meal in which i did the blessing, never know what to say for those, hid eggs and hunted them too, watched a incredible sad and disgusting movie about a poor women being stoned for no reason.

Saturday i had a date with another guy named Chris, this guy i had talked with a while back, but things were going on we couldn't meet up , then not long ago he started talking with me again, and he wanted to finally meet and we had planned it, but he said things that made me feel his intentions weren't a honorable one, so i kinda canceled the date, then a few weeks later he talks to me again apologizing for the way he conducted himself and we schedule another date, and i was so nervous because this guy is a smarty pants with a capital S lol, anyway he picked me up and it was funny because he is different looking from his pictures kinda weird but it wasn't bad i just thought he was going to more buffer lol, but he looked great none the less and he was very funny, we ended up going to Olive Garden, we talked and laughed and had some great wine my fave wine actually, and it just was a awesome time i believe, so after that he took me home and he got out of the car and we hugged not sure if he wanted a kiss and i was kinda like outta of it not sure what to do type mode so yea, but he seemed like he enjoyed the date and me, but not entirely sure, because the last time i had a good date like that, the guy just wanted to be friends, and i don't want to like straight out and ask him "Hey dude what you think" lol but he did text me afterwords so that's a good sign right ??? time will tell i suppose, i mean i thought i looked hot, my sister said i did, wonder if he did, honestly i don't think he did, i mean all online he would say that i was a hottie and all this stuff making me blush, but once i was there he didn't say anything to the matter so i think maybe it's the whole you looked better on myspace type jazz, which i understand, but damn i loved my outfit i wore it was hot, and if i had wore my sex dress then maybe he would of said something like "damn baby you got it going on" lol but all in all i had a good time, it was fun and i smiled the rest of the day, you could swear i just had some awesome sex lol.

On friday my best friend Melissa and my friend Jessica we all went to palm springs to do a interview to work at a vendor thing at the coachelle concert we would work morning til 1pm and the rest we could enjoy the concert, it would be awesome to go, but i don't think i am going to get picked. So after we did that we went to visit this store it's a chain of the place i used to work at and me and melissa never have seen it so we went to check it out, and then after that we went to go see "Clash of the Titans" which was pretty good, not awesomely amazing like "Avatar" but it was good, although my bff Melissa didn't like oh well to each is own right, after that we went to sally's salon because i had to find some purple dye i wanted to color a little bit for the date i had sat. but all we found was semi permanent that i would have to bleach my hair to be able to see it so i just bought a purple hair clip so it was all good, then i went home and got things ready for the next day :D and then went to sleep.

it's been a pretty busy weekend, and i actually was supposed to meet this guy tonight named Kirk, but dude i am so wiped out i am just not even texting him i feel majorly bad but i need to just be home right, plus i do kinda feel what this guy is only aiming for i mean come on what else is there to do at 10 pm at night so i hate to do this to people but i am so flaking, because if i text him telling him i am exhausted i am going to get a ear full, but i am also thinking maybe i should just say hi see whats up and if he does want to meet still then do it or pray he is tired too.

well we will see what ends up happening i am done for tonight, Night night.

XOXO D