Only in my Dreams

Hiya sorry been a while since I wrote again :::pats top of head ::: i need to at least get on here every three days or something so anyway on with the life update.
Ok so Last time i talked about a guy that i was hanging out with that i hadn't kissed , so he took me to get some pet food for my rats , and on a sad note the Emu was not there sadden like i was going to be able to get him, it was just a cute thought lol. Anyways the whole time i did not feel comfortable with this guy whose name is Darren by the way and every time he put his arm around me i would cringe that's how i knew its soooo over, so he took me home after we got the pet food because i made the excuse that i had tons of laundry to do , which technically wasn't a lie i did have a lot of laundry to do, and i just used it so i can get away from him.

So then one day i was playing on the internet and i got a message from this new guy, he seemed interesting so i decided to talk to him and he was pretty cool, his name is Chris, but if you remember a guy i was hanging out with named Vince, They are sooooo similar with some minor differences , so basically Vince was a guy who loved to play the guitar and was looking to play in a band, he worked, he still lived at home, lives a hour away from me, but doesn't drive, ok so Chris Loves to play the guitar and is in a band ,still lives at home, he works, lives a hour and some minutes away and doesn't drive .... oh yes and they both fell for me quickly both have said "I love you" to me , now i made the mistake of saying it back to Vince when i knew i wasn't , but when chris said it to me , i told him it is too soon to say it and i am not there, we have met and in a sad way my affections for him fell, like on the phone he was awesome very fun, flirty, and cool, in person he was kinda weird , he is a weird guy but in a cute way, but in person it was creepy weird lol, now he too is a sweet guy and could probably make me happy, but right now i am not, and even though he is suffocating me with attention, i am not feeling it , i even told my friends and family about the situation and every one says to bolt. Right now i am drawing him a picture and i believe after i finish it and email him a copy of it , i am going to end it, because he truly loves me, but i am not even close i like him , but i do not love him.

Been down the past few days , because i would like to find a local man who wants to date and have fun and fall in love with each other I had a dream of the perfect date , get picked up do something silly and fun like mini golf, have some dinner, go do karaoke, then go somewhere where you can see the stars and talk and relax and not let hormones get in the way of a sweet moment, we might share a kiss who knows its only between the stars.

It's soo weird how my friend realized that something was wrong right away last night, but i denied it, but she knew and kept probing, i know inside i will find the one i am ment to be with, just getting tired of all the frogs, would like to come across the prince now.

So nothing else is really going on, oh yea there is one more thing, so i've stopped presuing that older gentleman who i believe is A.D.D, and once i did he suddenly has been messaging me non stop , but i am not really giving him answers, would just like to pack up my ratties and run away, but that is only in my dreams where that could happen.

Night night .

XOXO D