Christmas Lights and some Nazis

Today was pretty good considering i didn't get to much sleep , because my friend came over about 11 and i did her hair for her, but then i got to take a nap then i did my own hair , and around a little after 5 my sister came over , the family got subway and after we finished eating we went to look at Christmas lights around Redlands, not many people where in the light putting up mood, we did see some good ones though but not to many, boy do i love when people put the Christmas tree in the window it looks really awesome that way, i was going to try and take pictures of the lights but then i changed my mind and just though i would enjoy them.

We got back to the house from Christmas lights looking and we watched a movie called "Inglorious Bastards" starring Brad Pitt , it was actually pretty good I enjoyed it, of course it was good though it was a Quentin Tarantino film he always does a good job. Then that was the end of family time.

I came into my room started playing the Garden game , and then began listing to that song "Eyes On Fire" By Blue Foundation and just started to get pretty emotional for some reason, seriously i think its because he has been in my head and I've tried so hard not to think of him or anything , but some way or another he ends up in my thoughts , dreams, or brought up by someone, so its really hard and i still have feelings well obviously with all the water works that is coming up , but i don't want feelings for him anymore, he doesn't have them for me , why should i continue to hang on to mine ? it sucks i hate it i want to get over him, i want to forget him, i wish i could leave this state i would be soooo happy not be around here for Christmas i just don't feel like it this year at all, and i don't know what to do, I still don't feel the Christmas Spirit with all the lights and the music and you should see the mountain of presents, but i just feel empty and sad and i want to cry , i usually like wrapping and i have still yet to wrap the things i got my family just kinda wish they would wrap themselves lol, I don't want to feel this way i really don't , but i do , i just want to pack a bag grab my ratties and hit the road, they are the only things that really make me smile, I love those crazy ratties so much, That is the greatest gift this Christmas is to have them around. Of course also having my family around it great i love them oh so dearly and even if there was a chance to run away i wouldnt be that selfish , because i want to be with my sister as she has her first child, that i would not miss. Well soon Christmas will be here and it will go by fast i just have to bit my lip and get through it.

five Days Til Christmas

"Even as an adult I find it difficult to sleep on Christmas Eve. Yuletide excitement is a potent caffeine, no matter your age." ~Carrie Latet

XOXO D